Friday gumflappin...err finger tappin!
This post will be short and sweet.
I don't know when I'm leaving, or if I am actually leaving. We're trying to work through things, and come to some solutions for the both of us.
I can survive not working for a little while more until I am able to, I can deal with the boredom, but I refuse to live in anger and sadness all the time.
So things are looking up..lots more to go through, but I'm happy that I've had a few chances to rant about the things going on. I tend to hold everything in until the last minute then I just become a total emotional fucking wreck...fun stuff eh...pffft! At least I'm not doing what I usually do when things get tough...tuck my tail in between my legs and run. It may get me out of a situation I feel is shitty at the beginning..but once I've had a chance to calm down I end up regretting the good ol tail tuck and run.
Ok, enough of that stuff..I think I was bitten by a spider the other night. I remember seeing one on my pillow but I scooted it off and squished the poor little bugger. I don't hate spiders, but they better not crawl on my pillow hahaa. I woke up the next morning with a lil lump on the back of my head and it is tender and sore. I don't remember bumping my head on anything..so it must be some kind of insect bite. Or maybe it was that psycho vampire kitty coming at me in the middle of the night...rotten lil black bastard.
Speaking of rotten little black bastards, him, Stash, and Jojo drove me absolutely fucking nuts yesterday.
I was a bad bad bad kitty mama and I didn't notice they were out of kibble til yesterday afternoon (they had some in their bowl that morning). They weren't even hungry..just they noticed the bowl was empty so all three felt it was their feline duty to follow me around, close at my heels all day long mewing, yipping, chirping, and doing that funky little purr/meow thing they do.
We went and bought a huge bag of kibble last night, and you know what they did? Took one chunk each looked at me as if to say "Oh good, my dish is full..time to go lay down" and they proceeded to all crawl up on the couch and fall into a sleep. It must have been such a tiring day making mom feel like a bag of turds for not having food for her beasts.
What do your cats (or dogs) do to get your attention when their dish is empty?
I love root beer
Ok, well not that the title of this post has anything to do with it at all..but yes I just love root beer!
My vonage isn't working again. Hasn't been for the last couple days. This always seems to happen near the end of the month. I wonder if it has something to do with bandwidth usage?? Anyone know? So I had to unplug the adapter and just go back to using the internet as my sole means of communication..GAK!
What else is GAK is the lack of half decent jobs in my hometown. Oh yeah, lots of decent jobs that I'm qualified for either north of south of where I'll be, but I don't have my own vehicle. Maybe I'll go pester the old boss at the gas station...maybe he'll take pity on my poor ass and fit me onto the schedule. Heaven forbid I get desperate enough to work at Tim Hortons again...aye aye aye that place was a real piece of work.
I wanted to find some decent pictures where I'll be living so you all can see how beautiful it is up there. Even during the winter...it looks like a magic winter wonderland after a fresh snow. I actually missed the snow this winter. Here in this part of Ohio we only get a couple inches of snow at a time, and it's not big fluffy thick snow like back home.
Ah I just can't stop thinking...in less than a week I'll be able to wake up, drink coffee, and walk down to the lake for a swim. Oh how I've missed that.
But now lets get onto a bit of a funny little story.
I was talking to one of my sisters on the phone the other day. I got to talking about our dad, and how much I can't wait to see him, to give him a big hug, and that me, of all people actually admit to missin the cranky ol fucker.
It was only this past year and a half that I realized that even though he was a cranky ol bastard, he did ANYTHING he could to help us girls out. No matter what. Any one of us could have had money problems, car problems, spouse problems or even criminal problems (though not me I seem to be the only good one in the family HAHA), he would be the first one right there to help us out, no matter what!
Only now after all this time can I honestly say that I have HUGE respect for him. Hell to put up with me for 22 years he had to have been a strong person.
So ok back to my story. While talking to V I told her how I felt so bad for treating Dad like a piece of shit, and hating him for really no reason at all..just my own stubbornness and sense of pride (which I got from him). I started crying, then she started crying, which in turn made my mother and other sister start crying. Well once I heard all those crazy bitches crying, I started doing that stupid half cry/laugh, which started all them on it too.
And I wonder why I'm so weird at times. Yeah my family is fucked up in some ways but they're good people, and I love 'em!!
I feel much better now.
It's a happy, somewhat sad day for me.
Now I don't normally talk about my marriage, or personal details of my life, but this is something that's not super scary or whatever.
I gave up my whole life back home in Canada to move here to the U.S. and get married. This is the longest time I've been away from home (my true home, and it will always be that). He didn't want to move up to where I was either. We kept putting off trying to make me a legal resident of this country, and by now I am sick of it.
I can't work, and i refuse to take a job illegally. I do not ever want to fuck up my chances of becoming a legal resident of this country.
I'm getting cranky, I'm feeling useless, well to be honest I feel as if I'm going insane. It is putting a huge strain on Mr. Dork, and I as a couple.
For the longest time my thoughts have been consumed with going back to Canada, so that I can work, and get everything immigration oriented dealt with up there.
I've finally made my decision. I'm going back after the weekend. I wanted to be there to celebrate Canada Day with my family, but I have too much stuff to do around here, plus I want to celebrate the 4th of July with my husband and his family. Who knows when I will see them again.
He's not happy about me going back, but he wants me to be happy so he's standing behind me 100% in this. Not to mention, since I can't work here I am a huge financial strain on him. We just can't seem to get ahead, and stay there.
I'm at a point of my life that I'm not completely sure of myself, of what I want out of life, so I feel going back, and doing my own thing will help me figure things out. Also it will help him live stress free as I won't be here being a total twat a lot of times, over stupid shit, out of boredom, anger, and just feeling all fucked up.
So that is why I'm feeling happy and sad at the same time. I'm happy to see my home again, the lake, all the people I know from there, my family, and my dogs..oh Coco and Pugsy are gonna go nuts when they see me.
But
I'm sad because I have to, for the second time in my life just leave everything, and everyone behind. All I can say is thankfully we don't have children. We do have the kitties, but I know he will take good care of them.
Oooh I was so scared. NOT!
Alrighty,
Well after reading a post on someone elses blog, I was reminded of something.
There are just way too many fuckin' freaks in this world.
I worked for a cable company as customer service, telemarketing and various other little things.
This one day I had to call up current customers and find out what problems, if any they were having with the service.
So I dialled the phone number, it rang maybe three times, and a man answered the phone.
I said "Hi this is Donna from ______ Cable, this is just a courtesy call. May I speak to Mrs. Blah Blah?"
The dude on the other end was really quiet, I figured he was just passing the phone on to his wife, or whoever it was.
Finally the guy said something..something along the lines of "Who the fuck is this, and why are you calling...you rotten scumbag bitch?"
I got all freaked out, and I explained to him who I was again, and he starts freaking out on me. Told me he was going to find out where I was calling from, come and rip me to pieces etc. Yeah, well I wasn't too worried since the calls were blocked, recorded and all that good stuff.
Turns out his mother had died like 6 months previously and her dumbshit son never thought to call the cable company and either cancel her service or update the files.
Gawd I hate people who fly off the handle like that. Send that dude to the loony bin please!
Doesn't take much to make me happy does it?
How did I get so damned lucky?
First my trip to the south in April...and now in a few weeks I'm going further south. YIPPEE!
Seriously..I love being in the south. I belong there for sure. I love the people. the way they talk..and they damned well know how to make some good sweet tea!
My husband hasn't been down to see his mom and other relatives since the spring of 2004. If I wasn't in the picture he'd have been making the trip to Florida at least once, if not twice a year to see everyone. I have met his mom, and one of his sisters from down there the day we got married. They showed up at dinner time to surprise the hell out of us. I have to say, my mother in law is the best. She's not one of those scary beasts that most women have to deal with as MIL's..but see it's reversed..my mother is the scary beast that my husband has to deal with (oh believe me, I do feel his pain).
My mom likes to stick her nose is our business and play stupid silly games and guilt trips, his mom does not...that's one of the big things.
So I'm really excited about this trip! The furthest south I've been in the U.S. was the northernmost part of Mississippi, not to mention I have never actually travelled anywhere with Mr Dork, and it should be fun. I like tunes while driving, so does he. The trip in April with the two ol ladies wasn't boring, but while on the road..no good tunes. No loud tunes..grrr!
I just hope we don't get into a bunch of stupid retarded fights over small things, heh..no I know that'll happen, but I won't let it get to me. I'll be too busy snapping silly pics to be bothered with him. Hahaha!
Well I've really gotta get my butt in gear and get some stuff done around here. We went for breakfast and I came home and totally passed out on the couch for the day. So Happy saturday, and party hard (or not)!
Aye Aye Aye!
What a fucking week!
Ok Shida was here..I had a god damned blast! (hope she did too).
She said she just wanted to live like we did over the weekend which was cool.
Now she got all excited over Moe's Place. Now you know Moe's from the simpsons right?
Well until I moved down here I had never been to a bar called Moe's Place either. She took pictures. We took blind in the dark only flash flashin pictures etc. We drank, we toked (shhh we did not...NOT lmao).
I just hope she had as good of a time as I had! I miss that shit already!
Our internet was out for nearly a week. Surprisingly this time it wasn't from Vonage. We forgot to pay our cable bill....OOPS!
So tonight I'm sitting here wishing for a storm like last night (HEY I'm a storm whore...love it).
I have NEVER seen the sky get SO BLACK..never in my fuckin life have I ever seen the sky get that dark! It was awesome. Nature's beauty to me! I guess I'm just a weather geek.
Tornadoes close to here...but I sat outside my sister in law's garage and saw the clouds swirling, circling, and rotating..but thankfully no real damage. That is the first time in my life that I've seen clouds rotate like that...total beauty in a morbid sorta way.
I mean I hope nobody gets hurt, but I want to see big bad storms!
Cotton and the Cat
Evil! Pure Evil is what Stash is!
Oh sure she looks so innocent and sweet here, eh? Don't let this picture fool you one bit. She has an agenda and nearly succeeded this morning!
So I'm running around in my usual sleepwear, which would be t shirt and undies, and I ran to the door to say bye to the husband. I'm standing there, and nobody could see me since I was standing behind the door with just my head poking out.
All of a sudden I see a brown streak fly by.
There's Stash, standing by the steps flickering her tail, shakin' that kitty butt at me as if to say "Neener neener neener, I just dare you to come out here in your knickers, bitch!"
So I crouch down, and open a door a little wider so that I can try to get her in without anyone seeing me. I'm frantically waving my hand at her, and cooing "C'mere Stashers baby girl, come inside with mom." She turns her head around, looks at me and squawks. Stash hardly ever meows like a normal cat. She likes to squeal and squawk.
Do you think the husband would help me out? Oh no! He stood by his truck laughing at me, just hoping I'd run out there at the same time someone drove by. Those two are in cahoots with each other. Bastards!
Now my cats are not outdoor kitties. I do take Stash out on the deck with me sometimes, but I have to watch her like a hawk, because she has a tendency to wander off. So since I didn't want to take the chance of her taking off while I came inside to put some shorts on,I just had to run out and grab her.
Success!
Nobody drove by, and I don't think anyone saw me from a window (I hope...c'mon just let me think that alright).
Now all three are lounging around, and Stash is staring at me, probably cooking up another evil kitty stunt.
So, yeah. I love my beasts, but they will someday be the death of me!
One More Day
Only one more day...and I am freaking out!
The excitement, and all the stuff I need to get done by tomorrow evening have completely overwhelmed me!
I did actually get the front room cleared out..now just to go through with a vaccum again and make sure the kitty litter and stuff is clean.
A week and a half ago my SIL dropped off 20 bags of horse treats that I need to roll and bake..never started on those until today. So far I've got 5 bags done, but I want to get at least 10 more done before I go to bed. I know I can do it, but my wrist is totally giving me hell right now.
WHAT THE FUCK is wrong with me? Why do I let things get me feeling so overwhelmed and helpless? Once I start feeling like that I tend to just shut down and obsess over it in my mind, and not actually get anything done. Please, just poke me with a cattle prod..that might help..haha!
Thankfully my husband isn't one of those types to get pissed off if I don't get something done, or am putting something off. He may not understand how or why I feel the way I do, or why I do this...but he sure doesn't try to make me feel bad for that. For that alone makes me just love him more..whatta guy :)
Was just taking a lil break..but now it looks like I'm going back to the horse treat hell. I'll be so glad when I've got them all done and ready to go.
I want to have everything done so that while Shida is here I can spend my time with her, and not worry about shit that's not done around here.
Oh oh oh..pain..motherfucking pain! I just tried to roll my chair backwards and my foot skidded along the floor and cracked against the edge of the desk. That's so gonna leave a mark!! I'm getting off here before I hurt myself anymore!
Try to have a good day, eh!
Do Da dee doo!
There once was a bird,
No bigger than a turd,
Sittin' on a telephone pole.
He kinked his neck,
and shit about a peck,
then closed up his lil arsehole.
That's all..go do something productive already...
I Can Hardly Wait!!
So, I found out Saturday that Shida is coming to visit and it's only been two days, but it feels like a fucking week already! You mean after today I've still got three days to go? WAAAHHH I want today to be Thursday already dammit!
We had to go to Hell-Mart again this weekend for a few things from the grocery section. This time I didn't get all confused and disoriented..maybe because I wasn't tired and not already stressed out to begin with. So fuck you Hell-Mart, I won this time, you didn't..neener neener neener.
Soo three days until...
The Fun Starts!
Oh yeah!
So I found out some exciting news today!
My friend Shida Pita who comments here, happens to be my bestest friend, and old roommate. That rotten lil devil bitch and my mother, and my husband had it all set up for her to come here and surprise me this coming Thursday!
OH MY FUCKIN GAWD! This is my girl...she's the shit, man!
Known each other for almost 10 years..gone through good times and bad, but she's always been there to help me out. I'll forever appreciate it. Not to mention she's one of the coolest fellow dorks in my life.
So I was feeling down in the dumps this morning and she broke the secret and told me she was coming down. I can't fuckin wait! It's been about a year and a half since I've seen her, as she didn't get to come down the couple times my mom brought our friend Brian with her.
Now for me to sit and plan all the devious shenanigans we're going to get ourselves in trouble with.
Anyone got a golf cart they wanna let me borrow for the weekend? Them corn fields are a waitin' (silly joke..don't feel like explaining it).
TGIF
Heh, sorry that ya all had to read last nights post. I was a lil bit off my rocker, pissed off and ready to fight..so instead I took my frustration out on my keyboard. A local friend and her idiot boyfriend pissed me off to no end..don'tcha love that?
Been a boring Friday here. I've been getting one of the rooms cleared out and trying to set it up.
I think I'm finally pulling my head back out of la la land, so I'm finding the motivation to start getting stuff done.
I feel really bad for the way I treated my husband last night. I guess because I was pissed off, and drinking, I said some not very nice things to him.
Time for me to cut the drinking out of my life again. I am far from being an alcoholic.. I don't crave alcohol, nor do I ever use it to get through hard times.
It's summer, it's nice and warm and nothing goes better with a nice day, a comfy chair on the deck and a nice cold Budweiser. What I am finding is that I tend to let little things piss me off when I have a beer buzz and it's not healthy to myself, or the people I love. Because I take it out on them instead of channeling my anger into a positive thing.
He's not mad at me thankfully. We talked about it this morning. I apologized, but that still doesn't make me feel good. I feel like a little bitch because of it. I didn't say anything hurtful, but was just being a mean little twat and I hate acting like that.
Well I hope you all have an excellent day and weekend.
Don't think this needs a title.
Know what?
FUCK YOU!
FUCK OFF AND GO HIDE IN A DEEP DARK GOD DAMNED HOLE!
Yeah, that's how I really feel.
You're a worthless piece of fuckin menstrual waste!
Nothing to me...not one little bit of sympathy for you.
So.... Fuck you...go to hell!
Luv Me.
Rot in Hell B.N. and D.C.
Ewww there's slime!!!
Damnnn. What the hell was up with Blogger today? Seriously..that shit was just wrong, and totally uncalled for.
I had an idea for a post and I couldn't log on. Now I forget what the hell I was going to type. Ah well...must not have been that important..hahaha!
I've been getting into the whole BE thing...stuck on BOTB's the last couple days.
Cleaned the turtle tank, and got over my fear of touching the damned thing yesterday, by myself. Well no, not really...
I freaked out over handling the turtle and got a friend to come over. Once she touched him, showed me how to pick him up, and I realized he wasn't going to bite..well that is, if you're going in from the sides.. haha. Lesson well learned.
So that's about the most interesting thing that's happened to me in the last couple days...oh yeah I'm practicing *Drunk Blogging*, so far so good.
Have a good night!
My Newest Tenant & Vampire Kitty pic
I would like to welcome The
Useless Men from
Useless Advice from Useless Men. I swear this has to be the funniest advice blog out there.
I was a day late in introducing them, so I feel that I need to BEG people go click on the thumbnail in my sidebar, or click
HERE right now!
Believe me, You won't be disappointed, so go see the
Useless Men!
Also, here is a picture of Taz..this one is titled Psycho Vampire Kitty. I tired him out by having him running around and jumping after the feather stick. He started panting like a pooch, and it looked quite funny..so enjoy.
Monday yabberin'
I had a whole post typed up last night..but it seemed whiny and all that, so I didn't feel like posting it afterall.
I was just watching something on Good Morning America..the Mayor of San Francisco was on, and I gotta say.. I liked what he said. I can't remember word for word, and right this moment I cannot find anything online.
Basically he said that he doesn't think the constitutional amendment on same sex marriage will go through. He brought up that until 1967 even interracial marriages were not allowed, but, this country got past that.
I know that there are a lot of people who are opposed to same sex marriages, but come on..really what does it matter if two consenting adults want to get married...who is it hurting? Nobody! I'm all for same sex marriages.
I was lucky enough to attend a friends wedding in 2004. P. and M. are two of the nicest men that you could know in this world. Always there to lend a hand, always involved in the community..just down to earth good people. Why do people believe that it's so wrong that they wanted to share something special between them, and to do it legally?
I myself, really don't think that the constitutional amendment will happen. It's a pipe dream for closed minded, self righteous, bigots.
So my friends out there of the GLBT community...never give up hope....all that can happen is progress..in the right direction.
Saturday Evening Bullshit Spewing
I really doin't know why I'm typing here. I felt compelled to post. Seriously, I was thinking that the blog gods were going to get pissed off and send a tornado this way to wreck my trailer..hahaha.
I've been suffering with a hangover from hell all freaking day...hell I even slept in til after 5 P.M. and I NEVER do that. I am not proud of myself from last night..I didn't do anything embarrassing, but I got into a little something that I shouldn't have and I'm feeling quite ashamed of myself for giving in, and doing something I promised myself I'd never do. But the way I feel today has totally turned me off anything like that ever again. Live and learn eh! Hell to be honest with you, I think feeling like a big steamy pile of crap has actually turned me off drinking for a long time as well.
I was reading a friends blog and she mentioned something about midgets. Ah it may not be PC to call them midgets, but I am not always a PC type of person. I think midgets are cute lil fuckers.. I swear! Not to mention that they're awesome because they don't let being little bring them down. They go on in life, live life how they want and don't let the rude ignorant people bring them down.
It feels hot as fuck in here right now. It's chilly outside, and I have the windows open, ceiling fans running...must be all the crap sweating out of me.
We're getting rid of the bees in the shed. We went to the brand new super walmart (super hell that is) last night and picked up some RAID foggers...set two off in the shed. Damn a bunch of them fuckers were totally dead when we got back after dinner. There's still some bees alive but we're going to set off the other two foggers tomorrow.
Hell they really must work because I was out on my back deck for over an hour earlier this evening and I only screeched once (them fuckers just like to fly AT your face y'know).
Speaking of our trip to walmart. I actually got lost in that damned place. It got so bad that I was worse than the Mr. He HATES shopping, but I could spent hours in a store just looking at stuff. Being lost in wal mart, well not lost but feeling all disoriented, confused and dumb made me so god damned cranky that I had to drag him out of there.
Funny part is..I don't get lost driving all over through Kentucky, Tennessee, and Indiana, but I get lost in a stupid walmart... oh the shame! I'll never live it down..hahaha!
Well I am now starting to feel a bit human. I drank a gatorade and almost a gallon of water since waking up. Now I have moved on to coffee. I never had a good hot glorious cup of coffee until now! It's like pure heaven in a mug! Good to the last drop. Now to go drink more and veg on the couch!
My people; we are without Bungholes...
Do ya all remember Daria? She started on Beavis & Butthead, then later had her own show?
Well everytime I walk into the bathroom and I see my Pantene shampoo bottle I start snickering and giggling like a lil kid. Why? Well on the bottle it says in Spanish "Hidratacion Diaria" (Daily Moisture Renewal). So what do you think pops into my mind every single time I see it?
I clearly hear the voice of Beavis & Butthead saying "Huh huh uhh hu huh Diarrhea" whenever they see Daria. You would think a 24 year old married woman would have better things to do with her time than sitting around reminiscing and giggling over the awesome stupidity that is Beavis & Butthead, but NOPE, not me...the cornier, cheesier, and sillier the better, in my mind.
And now I leave you with this sparkly little gem.
Operator: "What's the emergency, sir? Is there an emergency, sir?"
Beavis: "Uh, yeah. Butt-Head's choking. On chicken."
Operator: "Listen carefully. Have you performed the Heimlich?"
Beavis: "Uh, is this like one of those 976 numbers? Uh, what are you wearing?"
Operator: "I repeat, have you Heimliched the victim?"
Beavis: "Have I licked his rectum? No way!"
